Movie Review – The A-Team or “It’s like the Losers, but not as smart”

Having languished in Development Hell for over a decade, arguably the most wanted 80’s revamp hits the big screen in the middle of the Summer Blockbuster season. Liam Neeson, Sharlto Copley (District 9), Quinton Jackson (MMA fighter) and Bradley Cooper (The Hangover) take the reins previously held by George Peppard, Dwight Schultz, Mr T and Dirk Benedict. They all certainly look the part, as you can see from the poster:

They’ve not reinvented the wheel here; at its’ heart The A-Team is a very daft, loud, brash bit of nonsense for two hours. While it’s true that the original show was pretty basic and unfeasible daft, I feel that  just aping that feeling is a bit of a waste of time. In this day and age viewers have come to expect more from even their most basic action flicks and, unfortunately, this is where I felt the film was a let-down.

The TV show always started  with a voiceover before the credits and iconic theme tune, explaining that the team had been convicted of a crime they didn’t commit. In this film, we see these events in detail and follow the team as they try to clear their names. The plot is accurate to the spirit of its’ TV predecessor in that it’s wafer-thin and doesn’t stand up to close examination. Framed by the obvious, moustache-twirling bad guys, Hannibal and co stage a pretty impressive series of escapes and try to unravel the conspiracy. Quite why it takes them so long, when the audience are likely to be facepalming at their stupidity, escapes me.

Cooper and Copley are the highlights of the film, ace-ing  the roles of Faceman and Murdock. Cooper’s Faceman is a smart-ass fixer and ladies man. He’d have been the guy dealing in black market chocolate and nylons for your grandma in WW2. He’s Hannibal’s second in command but he’s very much his own man, not just a yes-man. Sharlto Copley continues to impress in only his second starring role. His performance in District 9 was great and there’s more evidence here that he’s able to provide a wide variety of styles and personas on screen. Murdock’s mania is funny and unpredictable but never overdone. In fact I was never quite sure whether or not he actually was mad, or just acting like it for one reason or another. Damn good pilot too.

The other half of the team are less impressive. Jackson is stretched about as much here as Mr T was in the original. He stands around, looking mean and occasionally punching/kicking someone very hard. Liam Neeson seems to be part Qui-Gon Jinn, part Hannibal Smith. He certainly LOOKS like Hannibal, but the character has some very Jedi homily moments which don’t seem to fit with the breakneck action sequences. Neeson actually looks bored. When delivering Hannibal’s catch phrase “I love it when a plan comes together” I felt like he was going through his to-do list in his head, the delivery is that flat and lifeless.

In terms of pure action at least, the film does dazzle. The trailer has already spoiled the parachuting tank sequence, but it’s still one of the highlights. The jailbreaks and the initial heist are very clever. Shades of Ocean’s 11/12/13 in the imaginative methods used. the CGI effects are nice enough but suffer form the common problem nowadays of looking TOO good, and as a result, less believable, paradoxically. this is especially true during a sequence at a dockyard, late in the film. Crazy to find fault with effects being too perfect, but that perfection takes away the suspension of disbelief I had. The Spider-Man films are another good example of this.

Clocking in at roughly 2 hours, The A-Team could have done with some tighter editing to keep it shorter. Had it been 90-100 minutes, I think the film’s shortcomings might not have been exposed so glaringly.

Yes, the van is in the film. Yes, the old school theme is heard several times and yes, it is still cool. There are blink and you’ll miss them cameos form two of the original actors but my favourite in-joke is subtle enough that many will miss it, but those who clock it will smile: While in the hospital, Murdock watches a film with the other patients. The actors names that show on the screen during the film’s intro sequence are all characters from different shows played by the actors from the original TV series. Reginald Barclay represent!

It’s a no-brainer film, silly, funny in parts but unnecessarily long.  See it if you still have fond memories of the original but bear in mind that The Losers did the same thing much, much better earlier this summer.

Comic Reviews 1/7

Well, this week DC took us back to the future but also brought an unnecessary revamp to an icon, Marvel took us to Mars and Image started a war in space. Quiet week, then…

Justice Society of America 40

Wow, here’s a good lesson in how NOT to wrap up your previous year’s worth of stories. This issue sees the climax of the recent Fatherland arc and ties up a lot of the threads that Willingham has been working with for the past year. Unfortunately, this wrap-up involves a big ol’ continuity reset button, retroactively re-writing the past 12 issues. In 22 pages. Right…

Willingham writes Fables, arguably one of the best new books of the past decade and consistently engaging, yet his work on Justice Society of America has been remarkably underwhelming and lacklustre. The sheer fact that he’s used Nazis as the villains, (Nazis!) shows a real lack of ideas. That’s not the best start on what was one of DC’s biggest selling team books. These characters and this franchise are one of my favourite things about the DCU but under Willingham’s stewardship, they’ve seemed bland and uninteresting.

Artwise, Jesus Merino continues to do a good job of detailing the action sequences and the quiet moments. He’s yet to develop a distinctive style of his own, showing glimpses of a lot of other artists. I think a year or two from now, he’s going to be a great artist, but right now, he’s functional without being exceptional. I hope he takes the step up.

It’s a good issue to jump off the title, written as if Willingham isn’t coming back after the two month crossover with Justice League of America. As I said above, that’s probably not a bad thing.

Batman Beyond 1 (of 6)

Wooooo! A new mini-series continuing the adventures of Terry McGinnis, the Batman of the future in Warner Bros “Batman Beyond” cartoon from 1999-2001. As part of the animated DC universe, Batman Beyond shows a futuristic Gotham that, for all its’ progress, still suffers from the same kind of urban crime that plagues it during Bruce Wayne’s tenure as the Dark Knight. Now an elderly recluse, Bruce provides Terry with the high-tech suit and Batmobile he uses to great effect i protecting Gotham from an ever-present number of wackos and supervillains.

This mini-series is set after the end of the animated series, but before the revelatory Justice League Unlimited episode “Epilogue”. Adam Beechen, who has experience of teenage heroes and Gotham from his tenures on Teen Titans and Robin, gives a great first issue. We’re shown the city, the relationship between Bruce and Terry and a mystery villain starts making his presence felt. Ryan Benjamin’s art is very fluid, but his faces are a little too manga for my tastes. The colour palette used here is interesting too, a lot of glowing greens and blues from the neon metropolis, or areas bathed in a red glow from emergency lights.

The pacing works extremely well here, giving us a good cliffhanger that makes me eager for the next issue.

Secret Avengers 2

Ed Brubaker continues to write Steve Rogers, former Captain America, in as many books as possible (this is his third currently ongoing series featuring the character). Leading the equivalent of the Avengers’ black-ops team, Steve and co go to Mars to investigate why contact has been lost with a research dig on the planet. Leading light of Marvel’s cosmic characters, Nova, has previously been dispatched and also gone radio silent.

It’s strange reading Brubaker write such and out of this world tale, involving alien planets, alien artifacts and mystical mind control. I’ve enjoyed his urban tales such as Criminal, his superhero work on Captain America and the grey area between on Sleeper (nothing to do with the lovely Louise Wener, sadly). Seeing him write and plot this story is a real sea-change for his usual content.

While I'm a big fan of Brubaker’s work, I really find it hard to read a book with Mike Deodato on art chores. His style is very dark, faces  seem to only have two expressions, deep consternation or wide-eyed surprise, and everyone stands like they’re posing for a statue. Seriously, It may sound like I’m being excessively harsh here but, in my opinion, his art REALLY doesn’t suit Brubaker’s writing or these characters. His design for the group’s aircraft is clearly the bastard lovechild of an Imperial Shuttle from Star Wars and the SDF-1 from Robotech. Yay for originality, huh?

It’s nice to see him use Nova, Beast and the current Ant-Man. They’re all interesting choices for an Avengers team, especially Nova. I’m indifferent towards Valkyrie and War-Machine right now. Actually I’m struggling to understand why an Asgardian warrior maiden with an attitude problem is even on the team. Unless she’s supposed to the team “Wolverine” what with him being unavailable due to already being on 4(!) different teams. Black Widow fits the team’s mission statement and Brubaker’s written her extremely well in Captain America for the past 5 years.

I’m looking forward to reading the end of the first arc before I decide if I'm sticking with the title. If I do continue reading, i sincerely hope there’s a new (read: better) artist in the wings.

Invincible 73

This issue continues the “Viltrumite War” storyarc and begins the actual war proper. the issue takes place over several months, with the scene shifting back and forth between Invincible’s convalescence on an alien world, watched over by his father and half-brother, and Allen and Tech-Jacket’s efforts with the Coalition of Planets to defeat the Viltrumite Empire. It’s not quite a filler issue, as there are some plot developments of note here. It does however suffer form the same faults that blighted issue 60 of this series: Lots of stuff happens off-panel, or in only one or two panels, and it deserves way more page time.

We get some nice bonding between Omni-Man and his son Oliver, now kid Omni-Man back on Earth. Having not seen him since he was a baby, Nolan’s reactions to him ring true and sound like a father eager to make up for missing out on his son’s childhood.

Allen and Tech-Jacket borrow a leaf out of the “Han Solo Guide to Avoiding Lasery Death in Space” (Good book, I recommend it, perfect for a scruffy looking nerf-herder like me) before leading the effort against the Viltrumites. A lot of battles and campaigns seem to take place out of the readers view, which is a shame as there’s plenty of scope for good stories there. A mini-series please, Mr Kirkman?

Ryan Ottley’s art is awesome as usual. Crisp, expressive, characterful and conveys motion and impact extremely well. I would love to see him on a book at DC or Marvel, but would hate to see him leave this book. :-S

Oh and Battle Beast returns. Roar, I say! Roar!

Movie Review – The Losers or “What if Shoot ‘Em Up and The A-Team had a kid together?”

The Losers is a bit of a weird one, based on the comic of the same name, it is nowhere near as dark as its’ source but manages to be fun, snappy and highly enjoyable nonetheless. Starring a solid array of actors, including Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Idris Elba and Chris Evans, the movie is a 90 minute action flick that it’s hard not to love. Even in the scenes where no-one’s shooting or blowing anything up, it keeps its’ momentum and moves on with no sections dragging.

Clay (Jeffrey Dean Morgan) leads a US Special Forces team consisting of Roque (Idris Elba from TV’s The Wire) his second in command, Pooch (Columbus Short) the team’s transport specialist, Cougar (Oscar Jaenada) the taciturn Hispanic sniper and Jensen (Chris Evans) the wisecracking wannabe ladies man who serves as tech and comms officer.

When we first see them, the team are in Bolivia to laser designate a drug baron’s villa for a bombing run. Just as they call in the airstrike, the team spot a bus-load of schoolkids being unloaded at the villa to serve as human shields. Clay aborts the airstrike only to be told by a mystery voice that operational control were aware of the kids and don’t care. Clay smashes the designator to force the incoming jet to target by sight and buy the team enough time to rescue the kids. This choice doesn’t go over well with the mystery man so as a result the team are framed for an atrocity and marked for death. That’s the first ten minutes or so. They cram in a lot of action in this movie.

While the comic did feature some great interplay between the characters, the dialogue here is equally sharp and quick-fire but can be more light-hearted at times. While not ostensibly played for laughs, there are some genuinely laugh out loud lines and moments, often provided by the film’s villain; Max.

Arguably the biggest departure from the comic, Max is literally a white cat short of being a Bond villain here. From the locations we see him in, to his master plan (heavily modified from the original), he is ironically enough, perhaps not quite as sinister, evil and calculating as his two-dimensional inspiration. Jason Patric makes him a great villain and delivers some of the film’s most killer lines with a flair that almost makes you like him for his dark sense of humour. Personally I find there’s two ways to make a screen villain memorable, either: Make him sympathetic to the audience to a degree by justifying his actions so that the viewer can understand their actions even if they don’t agree with them OR make him wholly immoral, cruel and intelligently wicked. Look at Alan Rickman’s turn in Die-Hard or Heath Ledger in The Dark Knight.

Chris Evans, as the team’s tech expert Jensen, steals the movie. While less combat focused compared to the rest of the team, Jensen’s moment in the sun comes when he infiltrates an evil corporation (Aren’t they always) to get a cipher the Losers need. The rest of the team are almost entirely absent from this sequence with the exception of Clay’s voice in Jensen’s earpiece and Cougar’s welcome cameo at the very end.

If there is a weak point in the film, it’s that Zoe Saldana is functional without being exceptional as the film’s sole significant female. I get that this has been packaged as a very macho, testosterone driven action film, but the Aisha we get here is not the dangerous stone-cold killer from the comic book. Maybe the director thought she’d threaten the guys or undermine them.

There’s some nice visual flourishes in The Losers, whenever the location changes we get a sweeping vista with the location name layered on top, in a manner reminiscent of the way Zombieland showed you the post-zombie apocalypse rules. Certain scenes will shift to slow-mo when there’s a particularly difficult jump, or a long-range sniper shot. I think this is what Michael Bay could be like if he wasn’t quite so over the top.

The film still works well, but I did find myself wondering what a more faithful adaptation would have been like. The possibility of a sequel exists, not least because one of Max’s plans is briefly mentioned but never explained during the film, although The Losers didn’t do great guns at the US Box Office and that more than likely hurts its’ chances. Go see The Losers, it’s 90 minutes of fun dialogue, great action sequences and you’ll be hard-pressed to find another film so unrelentingly kick-ass this summer.

Comic Reviews 13/5

Apologies, I know these are late, both last week and this were big weeks for comics in terms of quantity and quality, happily enough.

And… Here… We… Go! (Comic Movie Reference, kudos to the first reader to email the film title to me)

Birds Of Prey 1

Gail Simone and Ed Benes re-launch the title they collaborated on several years ago. After Gail’s unfortunate departure from Wonder Woman (Bringing an end to arguably one of the the best runs on the character, up there with Rucka, Jiminez and Perez) she’s come home. BOP traditionally features an all female main cast, operating like Charlie’s Angels under the direction of Oracle, the now paralyzed former Batgirl.

Gail’s given each of the main three women a very distinct voice: Oracle’s the controlled one who still struggles with being removed form the front-lines. Black Canary’s fierce but with the wisdom her experience has given her, not as headstrong as other heroines. Huntress is still angry, still impulsive and still more likely to aim her crossbow at something vital than the other two would like.

Over the years, under Gail’s stewardship, the ladies of the BOP have developed and grown very credibly. Huntress has calmed a little, Oracle’s opened up a little and Canary has accepted her role as one of the senior heroines and role-models of the DC universe.

The rest of the cast is the gloriously wild Lady Blackhawk, a time-lost WW2 pilot who looks like she should be on a cheesecake pin-up shot, albeit with a pair of nickel-plated automatics in her hands and the returning duo of Hawk & Dove. The last two are a curious addition, not least because Hawk is a guy. Hey, who let a dude in the clubhouse?! Hawk and Dove are avatars of War and Peace, respectively and have both come back from the dead. Quiet where these characters are going to fit in the BOP, I’m not sure and I’m curious as to how Gail’s going to make me care about them. I’ve always been apathetic about them, bordering on dislike.

Looking at the art now, Ed Benes work is light years better here than his turn on Justice League of America where it was over-inked into oblivion. The lines here are thinner and while not as clean as his earlier BOP work, still retain the fluidity, sense of motion and cheesecake-without-excessive-exploitation that made him such a big name to begin with.

This first issue sees Oracle put the band back together to track a mystery villain who’s threatening to expose the superhero community’s secrets unless the Birds stop him. That’s it. We have no further information on the mystery villain, or even if it IS a he. The issue ends with the Birds trying to prevent the Penguin’s murder at the hands of the White Canary (Who I’m guessing is Lady Shiva…), a new villainess wearing a negative version of Black Canary’s outfit but with the lower half of her face masked.

It’s a good start, it feels like Gail never left the book which, given the less than stellar nature of the previous volume after her departure, is no bad thing. These are characters that existed for decades before Gail wrote them, but who she has made into her own creations. Birds of Prey looks set to be another success for the creative team, bravo!

Booster Gold 32/Justice League: Generation Lost 1

I’m reviewing these together as A) They both feature Keith Giffen co-writing, B) They both feature Booster Gold “The Greatest Hero You’ve Never Heard Of!” and C) They cross-over at the end of Booster Gold 32.

Giffen & DeMatteis return to write Booster’s adventures in his ongoing title, having previously written him in the Justice League titles of the late 80’s and early 90’s and the critically acclaimed Formerly Known As The Justice League and I Can’t Believe It’s Still Not The Justice League a few years ago. While they’re famed for what many see as an irreverent take on superheroes, the pair have written some extremely strong tales with a lot more maturity than their critics might admit.

Taking the reins after Booster’s creator, writer & artist Dan Jurgens, finished his recent run on the title, Giffen & DeMatteis give us a neat “done-in-one” story that continues the premise of Booster being a time-cop, a la Sam Beckett from TV’s Quantum Leap, diving into the past and future to ensure events play out the way the universe needs them to. During this issue’s mission: Booster fights a classic Legion of Super-Heroes villain, saves a young girl, brings her back to his base of operations to save her life and discovers that Max Lord the man who murdered his best friend, is alive. Hold on tight, it’s going to be a wild ride…

I was pleased to see Chris Batista on pencils here, I never read the Steel series he worked on but I really liked his style on 52. I find it to be clean, crisp and is just as good at portraying widescreen action sequences as it as facial expressions and close-ups. I’m hoping that the writers will bring back some of the more notable JLI-era opponents for Booster to tackle as I’d love to see Batista handle Despero or the Extremists.

Justice League Generation Lost is a bi-weekly title featuring the surviving heroes and heroines who joined the Justice League during the Giffen/DeMatteis era: Booster Gold, Fire, Ice, Captain Atom and in the next issue or two; Rocket Red and Blue Beetle. Following on from the return of Max Lord, all the heroes of the DCU are searching for him. Max’s last plan involved mind-controlling Superman, so they’re understandably worried at the thought of Max being loose. Captain Atom, Fire and Ice track a nuclear weapon in Yemen while Booster is sidelined by the League as they question his objectivity should he find Max first.

Following up a lead, Booster does find Max but is bushwhacked and left for dead while Max executes his Keyser Soze moment, in  a bathtub full of ice with a lot of IV blood on standby. Booster manages to call for help and is found by the other three, battered and bleeding. As other heroes arrive, the four heroes are worried to realise no-one else knows who Max is. He’s used his telepathy on a global level to force everyone to forget he exists. Quiet why the former-leaguers are immune hasn’t been revealed yet, this is only part 1 of 26!

Aaron Lopresti brings the same art skills he showed to great effect on Wonder Woman here to a team book. Similar in style to Batista’s work on Booster Gold (deliberate move by DC Editorial?) it’s clean, fluid and great at conveying expression and feeling.

The issue is solid, a good introduction to the characters and the plot, each character gets a page or two dedicated to themselves showing who they are and why they’re relevant here, before the story proper takes over. I’m a sucker for this era of the Justice League. From the characters to the dialogue, I loved it. To now have the same characters together again and being co-scripted by Keith Giffen, this is a book I’ve been excited about ever since it was first announced months ago.

 

Super-Short Reviews

So much came out last week, I’ve had to bump some books from full reviews to shorter ones:

Siege 4

The endgame of Bendis’ masterplan for the Marvel Universe over the past 5 years reaches it’s climax. There are no surprises here, everything had either already been spoiled or was obviously coming. Pretty pictures and some typically snappy Bendis dialogue. At least you didn’t have to read the tie-ins to understand it all.

Sentry: Fallen Sun

SPOILER WARNING – The Sentry dies in Siege 4, he gets hit in the face with the HAMMER Helicarrier, then Thor drops Mjolnir on him and fries his ass with lightning and just for good measure throws him into the sun. His funeral shown here is weird, Rogue reveals she had an affair with him(!) and the Fantastic Four wax lyrical about the Sentry’s finer points, glossing over the fact he was a drug-addled, wife-beating crook with a split personality. Glad to see the back of the Sentry but depressed that the foundations for his return are seemingly laid here.

New Avengers Finale 1

This book reads like an epilogue to Siege and the New Avengers series that closes here. Standing amidst the wreckage of Asgard, the Avengers round up those villains who took part in the assault and attempt to track down the Hood who commanded them. Pretty pictures from Bryan Hitch, much better than the scratchy stuff he turned in for Captain America: Reborn last year. Cheeky price point for a book with so many splash pages but worth a read.

Comic Reviews 6/5

As promised a week or two back, I’m reviewing some books that are outside the usual super-hero titles from the Big Two I normally stick to.

First up from DC’s Vertigo imprint is I, Zombie…

I, Zombie 1

Roberson and Allred launch a new ongoing series, hoping to be the next big hit. Vertigo have the evergreen Hellblazer and the frankly fantastic Fables, but have been short on significantly successful ongoing series since the finales of 100 Bullets and Y: The Last Man.

This series is set in Eugene, Oregon, where the supernatural and the extraordinary are a lot more common than the general population think. Gwen, our protagonist, is the titular zombie and works as a gravedigger. To keep her undead hunger at bay, and retain her personality, Gwen has to consume a human brain once a month. Fortunately, her job gives her illicit access to (relatively) fresh human brains whose owners won’t notice them missing. Gwen’s circle of friends includes Ellie, the ghost of a young woman who died during the 1960’s and Spot, who is a were-terrier(!). Gwen seems to have little to no memory of her life before her death and runs whenever she sees anyone she recognises but can’t remember why.

Also in the first issue, we meet two mysterious agents for “The Corporation” who appear to be on a mission to eradicate any undead they find and we find out that the local paintball venue is staffed by a femme fatale vampire. As Gwen eats this month’s grey matter, she gets flashes of the dead man’s life. His memories overlay on top of her own and she feels driven to solve the mystery of his death, so that he’ll find peace.

Allred’s art is a good fit for the book. He’s got a real knack for facial expressions with a frugal style. There’s no wasted lines, but it never feels spares or simplistic. As an intro to the characters and concept, this is a great issue. There’s a good balance of introductory exposition and plot development. The cliffhanger is good enough to make me want to buy the next issue, which is the idea really.

GI Joe: Cobra II 4

IDW Publishing re-launched the GI Joe franchise a little under eighteen months ago, choosing to ignore the long-standing Marvel continuity and the Devil’s Due continuity that followed on from it. By starting from the ground up, IDW have added some new twists to what could otherwise have been a very formulaic and clichéd concept. The core book of GI Joe was joined by GI Joe: Origins, spotlighting individual members of the team, and GI Joe: Cobra, which was arguably the biggest surprise and most satisfying read.

GI Joe: Cobra (Hereafter GIJC for brevity’s sake) starred a Joe agent codenamed “Chuckles” who was dispatched by his commander to infiltrate a terrorist group and try to discover who was bankrolling them, if the urban myth of Cobra was true. Chuckles differs from the rest of the Joes shown in the franchise as he’s not squeaky clean, not even close. He’s picked for the mission due to his being able to see the grey areas that others within the group might not.

Christos Gage’s plotting is extremely good and light years away from the gung-ho style of storytelling that Chuck Dixon is pursuing in the main GI Joe title. If you tell someone that the villains of the piece are a terrorist group whose footsoldiers are all named after various ophidian creatures, they’re going to laugh at you. Somehow, Gage has made Cobra into a credible terrorist threat. He shows you the financing side, the subtle destabilising efforts they apply to nation-states, not just the paramilitary action sequences. He makes the characters more than just moustache twirling pantomime villains, giving them more depth than they’ve ever been given previously.

The art is similarly a world away from the more traditional style on the main book. Here, everything is very stark, almost minimalist by comparison. Facial expressions are very effective and clear but never over-stated. The use of shadows and close-ups work is also very well done.

This issue was supposed to be the end of the second mini-series exploring Cobra from Chuckles’ point of view, but the series has proven to be such a success that it is being made into an ongoing. This issue ends with a helluva a cliffhanger, leaving our “hero”, such as he is, face to face with the most notable absentee from the current Joe series. While I’ve long since stopped reading the Origins series and am losing patience with the main book, GIJC has still got me hooked and eagerly awaiting the next issue every month. Plus, Howard Chaykin covers! Wooo!

Movie Review – Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time or “Why are films based on video games so bad?”

I was lucky enough to get to attend a press screening of Disney’s new film Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time, Mark Kermode was 4 seats away from me. Total geek out.

Coming from Disney and Jerry Bruckheimer, this is hoped to be the start of a new franchise to follow up on Pirates of the Caribbean. Now I’m not a big fan of the Pirates trilogy, but I can’t argue with the massive amount of cash they took at the box office and later at retail.

Based on the more recent Prince of Persia video games, rather than the old school originals, this film follows the adventures of Jake Gyllenhal as Dastan, 3rd in line to the Persian throne. Unwittingly taking a magic dagger as a trophy, Dastan is forced to go on the run for a crime he didn’t commit. A bit like the A-Team, but with baggy silk trousers and no guns. Accompanying him is the Princess Tamina, charged with guarding the macguffin. Gemma Arterton performs a very similar role here as she did in Leterrier’s recent remake of Clash of The Titans.

The film suffers badly from an atrocious script with some very clunky dialogue, needless exposition that treats the audience like idiots and direction that seems deliberately geared toward making the film feel wooden.

The pace is pretty solid, moving from scene to scene fluidly with only minor drag points but some effects let the film down by appearing a bit TOO perfect and therefore seem less real. The sequences when Dastan uses the sands of time are nicely realised, but the face of the time-shifting character looks too obviously CGI. I was pleased that the soundtrack stayed suitably relevant and appropriate to the setting, as opposed to going down the nu-metal road.

One of my biggest issues with the film is that while it’s based on a video game, it shouldn’t feel like I’m watching the video game being played. If it does, then what’s the point? By all means, dramatise the story from the game and recreate one or two iconic action sequences from the game but don’t make it the same. Game these days have so much attention paid to their storylines and cut-scenes, they’re almost interactive films as it is. Making a game into a film can seem like reinventing the wheel.

Still, it’s comforting to see Hollywood continue with the proud tradition of “We need an evil duplicitous villain, get me a British actor” In this case, Sir Ben Kingsley, who puts in a suitable if unspectacular performance as Nizam, the Persian king’s Vizier and brother. Alfred Molina also appears in a semi-Jack Sparrow role as a roguish bandit. He gets some funny lines but they feel out of place in what is otherwise a fairly po’faced film.

I’ll be very surprised if this film does well at the box-office after the reviews I’d expect to see in the press. The story is facile and lacking in surprises, the direction has resulted in some wooden performances from the two leads. It’s going to go over well with kids and those seeking an undemanding bit of fluff, but when you’ve got films like Iron Man 2 coming out, A-Team et al, and you’re hoping to kick-start a franchise, you’ve got to be a bit better than this.

Comic Reviews 29/4

Due to Mother Nature’s Icelandic Indigestion, the weekly comic shipments went right up the spout. Obviously a week without comics was the most significant and traumatic impact of the ash-cloud-induced flight ban.

This week’s trip to the store resulted in a rather bumper haul but I’m not going to review all of them, don’t worry. :)

Siege: Secret Warriors

This one-shot, tying in to Marvel’s current blockbuster event book Siege, focuses on Alex/Phobos and his reaction to the death of his father Ares in Siege. Written by Jonathan Hickman, the writer of the ongoing Secret Warriors book and Fantastic Four.

Yes, that’s Ares as in the God Of War. One of the better additions to Bendis’ Avengers team, Ares was killed by the Sentry during the battle for Asgard. His adolescent son Alex has recently accepted his powers as Phobos, God of Fear and joined a group of underground heroes fighting a black-ops style war against various organisations trying to control the world. With me so far?

Alex sees his father’s death via a news report and decides he needs to have a quiet word with POTUS over his handling of things. The rest of the issue is split between Alex making the entire Secret Service look like the keystone cops, and Nick Fury and Captain America catching up water-cooler style while they fight the villains attacking Asgard.

The issue would have been better served, in my opinion, by focusing wholly on Alex. This issue was unlikely to be bought by those not already reading Secret Warriors and they’re familiar with Alex’s relationship with his father, his acceptance of his godhood and the struggle he has with being a human boy AND a god. the banter between Fury and Cap feels out of place. Too jokey and relaxed given the circumstances of their reunion and current situation.

Alesandro Vitti’s art has echoes of Jim Calafiore, but avoids the very square, “blocky” feel that Calafiore’s art sometimes has. While his style is very different to the art in the ongoing Secret Warriors book, he suits the tone of the story well and conveys a great sense of motion and energy in the action sequences.

All in all, not an essential tie-in to Siege, and not as involved as I’d have liked, but maybe Hickman’s going to follow up on Alex’s grief and anger in the regular title.

Victorian Undead 6

As the title subtly states above, this is Wildstorm’s “Sherlock Holmes Vs Zombies!” book, and also the last part of the mini-series.

Fairly sound premise really: Take Holmes and Watson, mix in Zombies and a touch of Happy Shopper League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, and you get Victorian Undead. A book that never matched its’ potential despite the core idea being intriguing.

Ian Edington has recently been working with Dan Abnett on Wildstorm’s main superhero line, but here he flew solo. Maybe I’m being too harsh; the book is fun, although the plotting in the last couple of issues has been pretty loose and a bit questionable at times, with some revelations and explanations seeming to come out of left-field.

David Fabbri’s art is a tad cartoony at times, but if you remember the early issues of The Walking Dead with Tony Moore on art, you know that zombie comics can work perfectly well without the art being  gritty and realistic. Carrie Strachan’s colours are great here and a key component in setting the tone and atmosphere of the scenes. While Fabbri inks his own work, he is sparing with the blakc and this, coupled with Strachan’s colours, gives the book a very soft look which works well.

As a denouement to the series, it’s an unsatisfying conclusion stealing parts from League of Extraordinary Gentlemen and leaving a very clear “To be continued” cliffhanger that doesn’t make sense. A nice idea for a series but one where the premise’s potential was never quite matched by it’s execution.

Transformers: The Last Stand of The Wreckers 4

Ok, you probably know that Transformers involves the Autobots, aka the good guys, versus the Decepticons, aka the bad guys. The Wreckers are the Autobots’ black-ops/special forces unit. All the hardest and most badass characters wash up here. Except Grimlock, but that’s because he’s actually too awesome, enough for the Wreckers. Anyone who thinks otherwise is clearly wrong. Clear? Good…

Anyway, this mini-series has one more issue to go and the pacing has been spot on so far. The Wreckers have been dispatched to a formerly Autobot-controlled penal colony to quell a riot led by one of the Decepticons’ primary chaos-bringing, hell-raising, ass-kickers; Overlord. Overlord has turned the planet into one massive sadistic gladiatorial combat. offering escape form the globe to anyone who kills their way to the top of the pile. The Wreckers go to this planet to retrieve any surviving Autobots (None found so far) and something called “Aequitas”.

Things, predictably, went pear-shaped early on in the series; they were forced to crash-land and split into three groups running for their lives, trying to complete the mission before they are hunted down and killed. This issue finds the team leaders being tortured while one group tries to find and rescue them and the other group locates Aequitas. We’re given the “revelation” of what Aequitas actually is but it’s a bit vague and not quite the game-changer it had been hinted at. There’s the suggestion that there are more secrets to be revealed in the next, final, issue.

As is usual for any Wreckers story, there are casualties. Normally you expect the no-mark redshirts to die, but there are one or two deaths here that came as quite a shock given how long the characters have been around.

Nick Roche’s art is supported by the gigolo-named Guido Guidi (Honestly, how is he not working his way through Miami, leeching off rich older women and working in porn? With a name like that it must be a legal requirement!") and they both put in a fantastic job of giving the angular, metallic protagonists a large amount of character, expression and emotion. Don Figuerora, artists on the regular Transformers ongoing series, could learn a  LOT from these guys.

Green Lantern 53/Green Lantern Corps 47

Normally I’d avoid combining reviews but these two issues serve as coda to the Blackest Night crossover within the context of the respective series. Dust settles, wounds bandaged, life returns to normal and new storylines are set-up.

The Green Lantern issue focuses almost entirely on Hal Jordan and his relationship with his ex-long term beau Carol Ferris. While Hal’s powers derive from willpower and expressions thereof; Carol’s come form her love for Hal and allows her similar abilities to him as a member of the Star Sapphires. They have a heart to heart during a jet fighter race and are interrupted by Sinestro, currently observing a truce by the letter of the agreement, if not quite the spirit. As Hal, Carol and Sinny (as I like to call him) head off to look at a White Lantern, Atrocitus, leader of the rage-fuelled Red Lanterns meets with two Green Lanterns. The GL’s in question are Guy Gardner, another human GL and Ganthet, previously one of the ancient Guardians of The Universe but now a GL. They want Atrocitus to go with them on a mission of some import that Guy feels will destroy his friendship with Hal.

The Green Lantern Corps issue features a wider cast and reads as an issue, rather than an extended conversation like Green Lantern did. Tomasi is great at managing his large cast, giving everyone some page time and adding some nice character flourishes. Following Blackest Night, several of the senior GL’s have decided that the Guardians need to be held to account for their behaviour in recent months. Their inaction, secrecy and arrogance has cost untold lives. As Kyle, Guy and Arisia confront the Guardians; Kilowog the GL Drill Instructor, makes a decsion on his future and a GL makes a big sacrifice for his partner.

A much better issue than Green Lantern, Green Lantern Corps covered a lot of ground, aligning the various cast members with the next step for them and the Corps. Tomasi’s leaving this book shortly to write the spin-off Green Lantern: Emerald Warriors starring Guy and Kilowog. It’ll be a shame to see him go, as he’s got a great handle on the group dynamic, the characters’ voices and a knack for pacing. Thankfully, although Tomasi is leaving, Pat Gleason is staying on as penciller. Gleason’s been consistently one of the best artists in DC’s creative but has never achieved the superstar status of his less prolific and tardy colleagues.

Blackest Night Director’s Cut 1

Blackest Night Director’s Cut is a bit like a DVD bonus disc for the recently finished crossover. With pages and panels of the series highlighted here by writer Geoff Johns and penciller Ivan Reis, it’s reminiscent (intentionally I would imagine_) of Wizard magazine’s Kingdom Come commentary of about, ooh, ten years back.

It’s pretty good reading, showing little details you might have missed, or elaborating on points that never got the page time they would have liked. There’s some script pages for an unused sequence or two.

The back half of the book is a collection of the character concept sketches for all the resurrected Black Lantern versions of heroes and villains seen throughout the main Blackest Night series and the ancillary tie-ins. Some nice pictures but a bit “meh” once you’ve seen them.

The content here is likely to be included in the series hardcover so unless you’re desperate for it, I’d skip this for the time being, especially seeing as it’s a $5.99 book! I really must check the prices on things before I get to the till…

Also in the bag this week were two hardcovers: Flash Rebirth and Invincible Ultimate Collection Vol 5. Will comment on them later.